Saturday, October 27, 2007

RECOVERY....

Wow! I can't believe that my last post left you guys hanging like it did. I honestly didn't mean to, and when it was written, I had no idea it would be my last post for so long on this blog. There are a few explanations I could give for how it happened this way, but in reality, there are two true reasons that tell the story.

The first and most driving reason is that my "depression" was so all-encompassing that I could not think of anything to write about but the sadness and emptiness I was feeling during that time. It got to be so bad that for the first time in my life, I found that I would rather not write at all than to continue to write what in my opinion was not helping me to get better and probably only causing those who care about me to worry. So that's what I did, I didn't write; at least not here.

The other reason for my lapse here was the fact that my beloved son's senior year football season began on September first, and I created a blog for his team and found that I could write there because it took me away from focusing on the mess that was my life at the time. Writing the blog for his team definitely was therapeutic in that it kept me writing which still is as always the goal.

At this point, I can say that I feel like me again. The sadness is gone and the emptiness is being filled by all that was my life before I started down the path I took over the last year and a half. I have found ME again and my amnesia has cleared so that I have been RESTORED. NO, I am no longer the me that I was before, but don't doubt for a second that that ME is still a part of the ME that I am now and let me assure you that this ME is all that that ME was and then some (LOL!!!!).

So for all who wished me well and prayed for my self to be restored, it has been. I've missed you all and I've discovered many things in this time, but for me, the biggest lesson learned is this:

LIFE IS THE WAY THROUGH PAIN!
and
I AM STILL ALIVE!!!!
(and happy as hell to boot ;)

1 comments:

Nikki said...

Thanks for the update. I was beginning to wonder what had happened to you. And what's your son's team's standing? How many wins and/or losses?