Thursday, March 09, 2006

Let The Games Begin...

Okay, so things were starting to get a little too deep over at Just Write Now! with Sharon, so Ms. Just Write Now herself decided to lighten things up again. Dependable as always to elevate her mood, she turned to the life of her son Ryan and found just what she needed to find her missing laugh.

For those of you who have missed the fifty-eleven posts in which I have mentioned my son, I will give a brief overview...he is a teenager (16) and my only child...need I say more ;-) Anyway, the chronicle picks up at the local Sprint Cellular phone store. Ms. Just Write Now is not feeling so just right, because after having waited almost an extra full year to purchase new phones for herself and Write Now Jr., in an attempt to utilize the $150 per phone discount Sprint promises after 18 months of service, she was presented with two unexpected turn of events:

  1. The fact that the long-awaited $150 in-store rebate is automatically reduced by $40 for each phone for some bogus activation fee charged by Sprint to activate any new phone purchased on their system. Hence, the $150 rebate is essentially worth $110. What a scam!
  2. The presentation of the final bill for phones for the two of us which suffice it to say, amounted to a total sufficient to pay my Grandmother's house note [which thankfully is paid in full] for three months.

Well, Ms. Just Write Now could have produced a few choice words for the sales representative had she not remembered just in the nick of time that he was just that, the sales representative, and not the FAT CAT whose pocket lining would now be thickened exponentially by Ms. Just Write Now's gouging. It was at this point, that Write Now Jr. decides to go into maximal teenage mode and say, "Wow Mom, it's a good thang we had those instant rebates or this would have been expensive!" I look at this alien who was pretending to be my kid and gave no credit for him being an innocent kid and I responded, "Get a job...then talk to me about how expensive this is or is not!"

Now I know many of y'all are thinking, "You raised him to be a spoiled brat with no concept of the worth of the dollar so stop whining!" To which I say, "The first half of the sentence is correct", as I believe not enough black children get the opportunity to be spoiled which in my opinion all children should experience afterall, we only get to be a kid once so make it GOOD! However, to the second half of the sentence, I say, "This is a kid who is required to save 50% of all gifts, earnings, allowances, etc. that he receives. This is a kid who must offset the difference between what I consider the maximum acceptable Mom percentage [a.k.a. the MAMP] and what the item actually costs for any luxury item [i.e. Air Force Ones] he might wish to have [which typically makes the luxury item much less desireable to this kid!]. In short, this is a kid who has been taught the value of the dollar in very creative and hands on fashions." Having purchased the phones, upon calling my son yesterday I got put into his voice mail as he had not yet turned his phone on after school ended. "What?", I ask you, "was my son's voice mail greeting?" One word..."Yeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!" , followed by a chuckle. "WTH?!?!" So I ask again who is this alien masquerading as my kid? The simple answer....a teenager!

The saga continues with an incident that occurred following my birthday which was about three weeks ago. My son is a handsome, 6 foot 2 inch tall, 280 pound, offensive and defensive line football player who gets good grades and has a great sense of short, to many girls he is what is known as "a good catch"! Now I know some of you are thinking I'm outta my mind, and I would probably agree with you if I didn't have this inside track vantage point. Anyway, as I said my birthday was a few weeks ago, and a week ago upon retrieving my mail I found an envelop addressed to me with no return address. Upon opening it, I find a computer-generated birthday card with a very lovely note honoring my birthday from a young lady who knows my son but who I have never met. When my son came in from school I showed it to him and the cat that ate the canary smile on his face as he read it gave me serious cause for concern :] When I asked him who the girl is, of course his answer was, "she's a friend". Well, I did not get into a debate about the nature of the relationship, I simply doubled back to one of his friends who I know well and found out that the girl "likes him a way...but they are just friends". Even I know that this most likely means she is the girlfriend on the horizon. I feel so used...the nerve of a girl using me to get to my son... I have been prepared all of my life for a guy to use my son to get to me, [afterall, my son is not the only good catch in the family ;0], but this parallel universe into which I've just been propelled will take some getting used to.

Life with my son has always been something of an experience and parochial school education has played its role in that experience to a large extent. When he was in KG, he came home singing "I'm A Little Teapot" and when I told him I remembered singing the same song when I was in kindergarten 25 years before, he looked at me with feigned wide-eyed innocence and replied, "Really Mommy?! Wow 25 years ago, was that before or after Moses came down from the mountain and gave the people The Ten Commandments?" To which I responded, "You don't need religion, I'm putting your lil' bad butt in public school!"

Forewarned is fore armed...and I was definitely forewarned but I kept him anyway [look at him...awwwww]...I only have myself to blame, so I guess society is right when it blames the parent for the acts of the child...oh well, we all have our crosses to bear ;-)


chele said...

The joys of raising a teenaged boy. My son is 15 and has no clue about the value of a dollar. I take the blame. I do. He is spoiled and so is my daughter. Not rotten ... but there isn't a whole lot that they ask for that they don't get. Except for the cell phone. I told my baby boy that when he gets a job and can help with the bill, then he can have a phone. No, I don't need his money but he has to know that no one lives for free. And sadly, his days of living off me are quickly coming to an end.

LadyLee said...

Cute post!

That's so funny about the girl giving you a card... You know she and her girlfriends planned that out... I can hear them now:

"Yeah girl, get his Mama a card, girl! He'll really like you then, girl!!!!!"

A couple of my 18-year old brother's girlfriends have had the nerve to cheese all in my face... I just give them the evil eye! LOL!!

Don't these young gals know that we were once their ages and we know all those tricks!?!?!?

But this was a nice post... I admire the love you have for your baby boy!!

Anonymous said...

Write now, Jr. is awesome!


Neets said...

they say kids ned to know what their folks go thru to give them what they get/want. from the sound of it... your son is connected to you. so you have nothing to worry. i guess you have to be alil more open to allowing your son to talk about girls(who are tending towards GF status)... the more hostile you would seem to the issue.. more he would want to keep you out of the circle. :) i enjoy the way you write... very frank and open

DP said...

Growing up broke...and KNOWING you were broke has its advantages. Even at the ages of 7 and 4 (the four year old doesnt get it...yet...but the seeds are planted) My sons are aware of where they fit in the socioeconomic spectrum. I think we try so hard to insulate our children from the evils of the world that we actually render them immune to them. This is the mindset that allows $150 sneakers to even exist.

The irony is even my mother says I tell the boys too much. I have to remind her who my parental role model was and retell all the economic horror stories she shared with me when I was their age.

Never trust a teenage girl you dont know who sends you a birthday card because your son is cute.

Take that from a son who used to be cute.

Dee said...


I divorced them years ago!!!!! When they shut my phone off for $4.37 I was DONE!!!!!!!

aaahhh teenagers!!!!! I could write a book!!!!!

My boys know there is no such thing as EXTRA money.......anything over their weekly cash........MUST BE EARNED!!!!! lol

I remeber all the fights in footlocker with my oldest(now he has his own money....yeah) I would say I.AM.NOT.SPENDING.ONE.DIME.OVER$70.FOR.13.YEAR.OLDS.SHOES!!!!!!

Then as his feet got bigger and he got older I maxed out at $100 thats WITH tax......LMAO

My youngest is a real sweetie...he goes STRAIGHT to the SALE section!!!!!

my oldest.........FORGET.IT!!!!


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